


Cleaning House

by raintail_7



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Enma as a snake, Sandai Kitetsu as a snake, Thousand Sunny as a cat, Wado Ichimonji as a snake, dorks being dorks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:56:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29769642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raintail_7/pseuds/raintail_7
Summary: Zoro had finally had it with the mice invading the apartment as well as  his annoying roommates who only seemed to know how to make the problem worst. And if Luffy's cat won't get the job done then it calls for drastic measures.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	Cleaning House

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece

When Sanji got of his shift at Baratie all he wanted to do was cook Luffy’s after lunch and before dinner meal before taking a good two hour power nap before he had to get up again and make dinner for both his roommates. What Sanji did not expect to see when he opened the door to their apartment was Luffy tied to a chair and screaming at their green haired friend and fellow roommate Zoro. 

It all started a few hours ago Zoro had placed Luffy’s cat Sunny, a large orange maine coon, in Luffy’s room. Zoro had a few minutes to prepare before Luffy would return from lunch with his brothers. Zoro wanted to avoid the chaos that happened last time Zoro tried to get rid of all the mice that had infested their apartment. Zoro was sick and tired of the rodents, they ate though all his clothes, shit in his shoes, and Zoro swears if he finds another mouse giving birth on his favorite shirt again, he was going to lose it. Zoro had thought Luffy getting a cat would fix their problem but the damn thing doesn’t hunt the mice she befriends them. Zoro then thought their third roommate Sanji would complain about the mice infestation, but the stupid love cook makes the problem worst by giving the mice five star meals, Usopp was a traitor and made the mice little plates. So Zoro decided to get a few rat snakes, he even found a breeder who has bred in strange colors. Sanji nearly had a heart attack seeing the white snake Wado, the red snake Kitetsu, and the purple snake Enma. 

At least once a week Zoro lets his snakes loose into the apartment to find and take care of the mice. At first Sunny would try and scare the snakes away, Sunny was too sweet a cat and tried to befriend everything and even though they snakes were killing Sunny’s mice friends the snakes were her friend too and she didn’t want to kill the snakes. Zoro learned quickly that he needed to lock Sunny in Luffy’s room, and to make sure there was good fish in the kitchen for Sanji to cook for the overly fluffy orange cat. Then a new problem arose with Luffy when he came home the first time to the chaos. Luffy went to save his poor cat who was crying in Luffy’s room, and while Sunny was rounding up the snakes and taking them back to their pen Luffy and Zoro got into a fight because Zoro was trying to stop Sunny and Luffy wasn’t going to let Zoro torture his cat anymore.

So Zoro had a plan this time, tie Luffy to a chair first then release the snakes, he made sure to get Sunny the best fish and Luffy the best meat as an apology afterwards, even if he wasn’t really sorry, but the food would appease them both. But Zoro felt like he was well prepared, he had a mile of industrial grade rope, and all of his weights, Luffy may be small but he was ridiculously strong. 

“Zoro, Sunny, I’m home.” Luffy called as he entered the apartment. “Huh? Where’s Sunny?” Luffy asked when his loyal cat didn’t come running the second, he opened the door.

“Sunny’s asleep on your bed.” Zoro lied.

“Ah, I see.” Luffy replied a little disappointed. 

“Anyways, the Cook told me he got you some premium meat and you’re not allowed to touch it.” Zoro lied again.

“Ehh, why would you tell me Zoro?” Luffy whined.

“I figured you’d rush to the kitchen anyways so I thought I should warn you.” Zoro explained.

Luffy pouted and half glared at the kitchen he was barely allowed into. 

“Don’t worry I thought this might be a problem and I have a solution.” Zoro stated, which got Luffy to look at him. “I’ll tie you to this chair so you can’t look for the meat.”

“That’s a great idea!” Luffy exclaimed.

Zoro thanked whatever power out there for Luffy’s gullibility. Luffy sat semi-patiently in his chair as Zoro wrapped the rope around him. Once Zoro was done with the ropes around Luffy he made sure to tie the legs of the chair, and Luffy’s legs, to the weights. 

“Can you move Luffy?” Zoro asked.

Luffy tried to move but could barely wiggle.  
“Nope.” Luffy answered with a smile.

“Good.” Zoro moved towards the snake terrarium and started to take his snakes out.

“Zoro what are you doing?” Luffy asked.

“I’m getting rid of the mice in the apartment.” Zoro answered. 

“But why? You know they are Sunny’s friends.” Luffy said.

“Why? I’ve told you a million times Luffy, the mice in this apartment are out to get me and you and your cat and the stupid cook only seem to encourage them. So, I’m taking matters into my own hands now.”

When the first mouse let out a distress cry that’s when all hell broke loose, Sunny who was previously confused on why she was locked away started to cry and beat at the door. 

“Sunny!” Luffy said as he heard his cat crying. “Zoro stop this can’t you see this is upsetting Sunny.” Luffy said as he tried to get out of the chair.

“The mice have overstayed their welcome, they had this coming.” Zoro replied as he turned on the tv. 

A couple mice ran past Luffy followed shortly by Enma. “Brie! Feta! Run away I’ll try and figure something out.” Luffy called as he tried to break out of the chair. 

Luffy continued to struggle while Zoro flipped though channels until he found a tv show about making swords. 

“Zoro how can you be so cold! The mice are innocent!” Luffy yelled.

“They ate my clothes Luffy they are far from innocent.” Zoro replied with little to no emotion.

“Sunny it’ll be okay somehow!” Luffy tried to comfort his cat who was still crying in the background.

“I’m back.” Sanji said as he opened the door.

Sanji stood in shock at the scene before him.

“Ah, Sanji help!” Luffy called.

“Oi, Dart Brows close the door you’ll let the snakes out.” Zoro said.

“What are you talking about Marimo? The snakes are in their cage.” Sanji said.

Sanji turned to look at the snake terrarium only to see it void of all snakes, and at that moment Kitetsu slithered over Sanji’s shoes. Sanji turned pale before letting out a very unmanly scream and nearly kicking the red snake halfway across the room before he quickly backed out of the apartment and slammed the door shut. 

“Why the hell are your snakes running free in our apartment!?!” Sanji yelled.

“I already told Luffy, but I’m getting rid of the mice infestation.” Zoro yelled back.

“You have to stop him, Sanji!” Luffy tried again.

“Like hell I’m stepping foot in that apartment while those things are slithering around.” Sanji stated.

So that’s how they stayed for the next few hours, Sanji sitting outside the apartment waiting for Zoro to collect his snakes. Luffy trying to escape while yelling at Zoro or the snakes and trying to provide Sunny some form of comfort. 

“Oi, Cook. I’m going to put the snakes away now, but could you call Chopper? I think Luffy may have rubbed his arms raw from trying to get out of the ropes.” Zoro called though the door.

Sanji sighed and gave Chopper a called, and the young doctor in training immediately said he’d be over to check over Luffy. 

Zoro opened the door once all the snakes were back in the terrarium, well almost all Wado had decided to take a nap around Zoro’s neck. Sanji cringed at the sight of the white snake but still finally entered the apartment. Sanji could see why Zoro wanted him to call Chopper, Luffy had definitely rubbed himself raw on those ropes. Luffy’s arms and legs were bright red and, in some spots, it looked like he was bleeding, but did Luffy care about that? No, he didn’t. The minute Zoro had freed him Luffy was rushing to his room to check on his cat. Luffy was now sitting on the couch cuddling his distressed cat not even caring about the injuries he sustained. 

“Luffy are you okay?” Sanji asked clearly worried about his friend.

“I’m fine I’m more worried about Sunny.” Luffy answered. 

Sanji had to admit the happy cat seemed pretty upset. 

“She’ll be fine once Dart Brows here makes her the fish, I got her.” Zoro chimed in.

“Like fish will help.” Luffy murmured while cuddling Sunny.

“I also got you meat. I figured you’d also be upset, Luffy.” Zoro said.

“I’ll go see what the shitty swordsman got you, Luffy stay here and try and cheer Sunny up while we wait for Chopper.” Sanji said as he headed for the kitchen.

Chopper showed up in a panic while Sanji was cooking. Sanji could hear Chopper trying to treat Luffy, and Luffy complaining because he’d have to put Sunny down so Chopper could apply the medicine and bandages. 

Sanji decided to make Sunny some cat friendly sushi and a few other cool fish dishes, Sanji didn’t want to make the dish too hot for the cat. Sanji also made all of Luffy’s favorites, because there’s no doubt that he’s going to be all pouty for the rest of the night and Sanji was not in the mood to deal with that. So, Chopper, Sanji, Zoro and, Luffy sat down and enjoyed a delicious feast. Chopper tried to convince Zoro and Luffy to not repeat today’s actions again, but Its Zoro and Luffy and they were bound to repeat themselves. As predicted Luffy and Sunny’s moods improved after they had eaten their favorite meals, and Zoro was already planning for next week, maybe he should drape Luffy in something soft, so he won’t tear himself up again.


End file.
